I think i am a difficult person - one with a big ego.
I am trying to temper it down, trying to control it though.
its when someone goes away from me that i realize how stupid i have been.
Guess thats how everybody would feel but...
i have no respect for life and God.
but now i am slowly learning the ways -
I am loosing all that i loved.
They weren't obtained by my effort - luck shone, so why complain!
maybe thats what confused me thinking more would come.
but how foolish i had been, not realizing how to handle what i got!
I must teach myself not to desire everything my heart wants.
its a sin, or at least its harmful in the long run.
its all the more worse not knowing whats happening, when something fortunate happens.
For you forget the responsibilities that come with power, and haste takes its place.
often astounding you and taking away what you got, before even knowing it.
the reasons would delude you and often be stupid.
I have learned a lesson or two now.
one thing stands clear - better stay away from the dazzling lights of desires.
better stay away thinking it ain't yours.
do only what your duty needs you to do.
you aint going to take anything away from this life..
so why desire for things that aint gonna last
and are for mere temporal pleasure and more so for sadness when we loose it?
You aint even gonna take your memories when you die, however good they may be.
So throw it away and think of life and what it means!
Think how it has made you evolve and forget the sorrows.
keep the happy things just for some pleasantness when u find it hard not to think back.
we should also be prepared to loose our happy memories.
For memories are stored in our brain.
and this brain is something we posses only during our lifetime.
We the Spirit have no thought. We also have no heart!
The Spirit is just energy.
Thats what we are.
This life is just momentary confluence of the spirit with the body.
We sure would return to our normal state.
In this eternal Spirit's many forms, life is one.
In such a minute form, our thoughts are yet more minute,
so our the consequences of having the mind -
desires, happiness and sadness (in short, emotions).
These sure aren't a part of our true nature - the Spirit.
So why then does the Spirit take such a form
and what does it try to achieve at the end of this?
Why does the Spirit take any form at all for that matter.
Makes me wonder whether it is the result of some ad-hoc genesis that started so long ago?
Nobody knows the answer.
Nobody even can prove that we are even Spirit, can we?
But there's enough indirect justification that makes me feel the existence of a Spirit.
There are many unexplained answers in life and beyond.
So just that itself makes us not to put down the ideas of an Eternal Spirit and it taking many forms throughout.
[by unexplained answers, I could give the example of how life is put into the very smallest human cell in the mother's womb? What brings it to life? At what point can we say we are born? Is there a Spirit involved? Maybe we can discuss this as another topic.]
I recently read a very interesting line on the net: "Once the desires start ruling us, we lose our freedom. If the desires are not fulfilled, then we lose our mental and physical well being." How true!
Another site has the lines: "Dhruti: It means courage. It is essential for performing or achieving anything. If there is no courage, great things cannot be achieved. In human life, there are several incidences where one gets attacked by many emotions. We have to fight such feelings. Many lose courage while doing so and fall prey to these feelings. They repent afterwards. So while leading the life, whenever such incidents occur, one should have the courage to face the emotions and gain victory over them. By turning away from such emotions does not solve any problems, but increases them."